IVF 2.4 - Follie Check #2 and 3

It is very late and I cannot sleep because of a late nap I took on the living room couch this evening. I figured that this is the perfect time to update on the progress of IVF #2. 

Last Thursday, the 19th, I had my second bloodwork and ultrasound check.  The nurse called that afternoon and left a message letting me know that things looked "good", but didn't give specifics about the number of follicles. She did say that the doctor wanted me to take a second shot of Bravelle for that day along with my normal lupron and repronex doses in the evening.  She also wanted me to increase my Bravelle in the morning from 150 units to 225 and come back on Saturday for repeat bloodwork and ultrasound.

This morning (Saturday the 21st) I had my third bloodwork and ultrasound appointment.  This time the nurse, who is not my normal nurse, gave me all kinds of information when she called.  She let me know that again things looked "good".  My estrogen was 937 and my lining was 10.  Follies are as follows, on the right: 2 at 15, 1 at 13, 1 at 12, and 3 at 11, on the left: 1 at 12. She said to continue my current doses of medication and to return on Monday morning for another bloodwork and ultrasound check.

Needless to say, I am a little disappointed.  With the follistim last cycle I was doing the egg retrieval on Tuesday.  At this point the earliest the retrieval will be is Wednesday.  And I am concerned about the sizes of the follicles.  None of them are particularly big and only 2 are at 15.  I can't remember what they want them to be, but I don't think any of them are anywhere near where they should be.  I know that the reason we are doing different meds this time is to try to get better quality eggs, but it seems I am not responding as well to these new meds.  And maybe that's the point.  More quality and less quantity.

I also didn't realize how emotionally invested in this cycle I am.  I have been trying to keep my distance from it all so that I don't stress myself out or become super attached to anything.  I have to do this for my own sanity. Otherwise I would be so scared and a total basket case.  But somehow, without realizing it, I have become invested.  And who was I kidding? How could I be anything but invested in this? It's my body and you can't inject yourself full of hormones and go through all of this without being invested.  I think it's one of the biggest investments you can make.

So .. for now it's a wait and see.  In general I am not feeling super optimistic, but I also know that it's not over till it's over.  All we need is one or two really great embryos ...